The Trials and Tribulations of Ineffective Listening



My wife Francis, the novelist, also has a 2nd blog related to communication skills and counseling. She calls herself the “Saying what Matters Lady” and this is what she says…
“We humans have a critical need to talk and to be heard, and yet it is an area we rarely think of in terms of self-improvement. This blog is to provide snippets of ideas on how each one of us can become a better communicator. Being able to say what matters and having another person hear and understand is an incredibly powerful experience. I would say it is the single greatest gift one can have in terms of building a relationship…”

Head on over for her introduction here – or go directly to The Trials and Tribulations of Ineffective Listening. Maybe you’ll find an insight or two. And the photos are worth a look in themselves.

Saying What Matters - Ineffective Listening Post by Bruce Witzel & Franics Guenette

Saying What Matters

In today’s post, as promised, we’ll take a look at a few ineffective listening scenarios.


This type of listening imitates real listening but obviously misses the mark.


As a busy mom in days gone by, I remember doing this type of listening. The kids talked and I went, “Uha, oh ya, uha . . .” Soon enough they caught on and told me how much they hated it when I said uha because they knew I wasn’t really listening. I’m sorry to say, right on the money, my dears. Oh, to be able to go back and do it all again.


This happens when we attempt to turn a conversation back to ourselves – usually accomplished through multiple interruptions. Oh boy, who doesn’t hate being in a conversation with someone who acts the stage hog?

Remember back to the last time you were in a regular everyday conversation…

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